What is it about murder that is so appealing? The act of it? I don't understand the reasoning for killing someone. It just doesn't make sense. I watch the news some times and I hear stories of murders and of accidental killings. But all that runs through my mind is "It'll never happen to me" But I've never been encountered by one of those situations in real life. Until today, one of my friends that I've known for six years was murdered today. By an ex boyfriend. He "loved her so much he couldn't live without her". So he talked to her through her window then asked her to step outside, when she walked outside he shot her three or four times before shooting himself.
I just can't help think, what the fuck was wrong with him? He wasn't an angry person. ((or so I was told because I never talked to the guy)) He had no violent issues in the past, he wasn't drugged, and he was a Mormon. A "nice" guy over all. I try to think about it, and I can't imagine the look on her face when a guy she trusted so much aimed a gun at her and fired. Is society so fucked up that a girl can't break up with a boy without getting killed? It makes no sense. I just can't grasp what led him to do it. She was..such a nice girl. She was a lifeguard for Christ's sake. She wasn't really religious but she knew how to stick to what she thought was right. A very independent girl. Kind, sincere, and loyal. A true friend.
I was crying hysterically earlier when I found out, after the denial. And now I'm just really angry. I can't help but feel that it couldn't have really happened, that nothing is fair, why did it have to be her? Why couldn't she get a second chance? She just graduated in May! She had plans for her future! She wanted a normal life, she wanted to live and get a husband that loved her, and have a job to help support her family. Why does it have to happen like this. Sorry, I have all these feeling and I don't really have anyone to talk to that will listen at the moment. Not that I care if you do, you can ignore this if you want I just wanted to get all these thoughts out.